To: Large dog who appears to think he was put on this earth to whine.
Re: Ya'll gon' make me lose my mind, up in here, up in here. Ya'll gon' make me act the fool, up in here, up in here.
It doesn't bode well for your day when DMX lyrics say it best.
Moving on! Jim and I had our first session with a personal trainer last night (we're actually getting a group rate because we're working out with two other couples, which is even more motivation to push through the pain. Everyone is watching! Must not collapse on the floor and cry!) Man, am I out of shape. I've been doing aerobics for a few months now, but let me just say that Zumba seems like a brisk walk compared to last night's torture. My muscles are so sore I was afraid I wouldn't even be able to lift Eli today.
My lower abs in particular are shockingly weak, even though just to look at it my stomach seems mostly flat again. I had no idea how much two pregnancies take out of you in terms of muscle tone. It was really embarrassing. There were a couple of exercises that I literally couldn't do because I didn't have enough strength in my lower abdominals to keep my back on the floor. The trainer assures me in a few weeks I'll be surprised at my progress. I'll be surprised if in a few weeks he's still alive. Sometimes the only way I could make it through a whole minute of whatever circuit station I was on was by thinking, F you, Dennis, F you. Except the word was longer than f.
Also, it's kind of weird to work out strenuously with people you know well. There you are, sweating like a pig, feeling sick to your stomach, and making noises like you should be in a delivery room, all in front of people you otherwise mostly just watch movies and have dinner with.
In other late-breaking news, you all DO know which movie comes out tonight, right? RIGHT?! I have actually convinced Jim to go see it with me, even though I also have plans to see it later with some girlfriends. Because they can't go to it tonight with me, and after waiting four months, I am INCAPABLE of waiting even a FEW MORE DAYS.
Oh, you don't know which movie I'm talking about? Skimmer. But I'll tell you. TOMORROW, when I review it extensively! You'll just have to wait!
And also, because apparently I have abandoned completely the idea of continuity in writing, here is a link to an article about women in the workplace during WWII that I thought was hilarious. And is genuine, according to Snopes. I'm betting that in the back of their minds, a lot of male bosses still adhere to some of these rules. Do any of these ring true to those of you working outside the home?
Edit edit URGENT EDIT: GAAAAAAA! My movie- fine, it's The Other Boleyn Girl, and yes, it's MY movie, as in, I HAVE RIGHTS TO SEE IT IMMEDIATELY- isn't showing in this town OR the one closest to it. I'm sorry, I wasn't aware this was some sort of FOREIGN film with SUBTITLES and ANGST and VAGUE PLOT LINES. I'm pretty sure this is a regular old Sony Pictures release full of partial nudity and elaborate costumes! What the frickity frick, people? Ya'll gon' make me LOSE MY MIND!