Friday the Thirteenth- IT'S NO JOKE!

A series of unfortunate events, in chronological order, without much commentary from myself lest my head EXPLODE WITH RAGE.


-As of two days ago, BOTH of our vehicles are in separate garages being worked on for what may or may not be expensive problems. One of said vehicles was just repaired for an unrelated problem about three weeks ago. Goodyear is considering putting in a changing table and a toy corner just for me, I think.

-Regarding above item, one of the cars was parked overnight at Jim's office awaiting a tow truck to take it to a town about a half hour from here because, according to Goodyear, where the car was taken initially, "it's not a good idea to have anyone but an authorized Ford dealer work on Fords." Well, apparently leaving your car sit in a parking lot downtown for several consecutive nights isn't a good idea either, because this morning we got a call that our windows were smashed in and our stereo is gone.

-The house we wanted was officially closed on today. By people named NOT US.

-It rained this morning, and we abruptly lost power right in the middle of Eli's nap and Adelay's morning movie-while-Mommy-cleans time. Now, I was >mildly put out that I had to stop mid-vacuum, but Adelay was positively BESIDE HERSELF that her Princess and The Pauper DVD had disappeared from the screen. She raged and tantrumed and sobbed hot salty tears into the carpet for about ten minutes to make sure I was absolutely clear on her feelings regarding the situation.

When I finally explained that the TV was "broken" (what, any port in a storm, that's what I say, even if that port is called lying) she moved on to pitching a fit about the semi-darkness of the living room. "No lights off! I no like it!" she wept, flinging herself into various corners of the sofa and shrugging me violently off anytime I attempted to console her. Finally I just kind of backed off, mentioning, "Sweetie, I'm kind of done talking about the lights. They're broken too, and I'm sorry, but it's not my fault. We just have to wait." Meanwhile, the AC was off too, of course, and the room was turning into a sauna as the steamy air of the storm seeped in. It was dark and hot, and the dog was panting his wet, garbage-breath terror, and Addy was wiping snot trails on the back of her arm and... Well, I can think of more fun ways and more fun company in which to spend a power outage.

-The dog, once the storm was finally over, had to pee like a racehorse, so I let him out, and no sooner had I opened the door than he raced across the lawn and disappeared. Apparently he comforted himself during the storm by plotting his escape.

-Lunch left both the kids a little too gross for just a wet washcloth, so I popped Eli into the bath and talked to Addy while he played. Suddenly a horrified look crossed her face, and I glanced over to see that my freshly washed baby had just had some sort of BOWEL EXPLOSION in the bath water, and was now SPLASHING MERRILY in it. I have made it almost three years into parenthood without once encountering this level of feces-to-water ratio, and I don't even want to say anything more about that whole situation except this: If asked, I would have guessed that I am sort of person who would deal with a bath time poop by saying, "Oh well, the tub needed a good scrubbing anyways." Turns out... NOT SO MUCH.

-The dog finally reappeared, after hiding out in the mud under the deck during the second storm of the day. My hands were actually shaking with rage as I scrubbed him down in the garage. SHAKING, I tell you.

-My computer has been a spaz all day, and while attempting to work on an online newsletter I do on a (semi) regular basis for my family's restaurant, it kept refusing to publish and randomly shutting down the Internet. I now have two hand me down computers which both possess the delightful personality quirk of RANDOMLY ABORTING PROJECTS and refusing to just DO AS TOLD.