Sorry, Shauna!

Hey, I just realized that I was tagged for this meme like a week ago and haven't done it yet! Sorry, Shauna- here goes:


Three Things That Scare Me:
1. Myself or my family being the victims of random crime (terrorism, child snatching, being run down in a McDonalds parking lot by a crazy person off their meds, etc.)
2. My bad dreams
3. The idea of drowning

Three People Who Make Me Laugh:
1. Jim and Adelay
2. Dwight Schrute
3. Tina Fey

Three Things I Love:
1. Babies (sorry to steal your answer, Swistle, but I cannot tell a lie.)
2. Vacations
3. Cleanliness. My dream would be to have Monica Gellar as my maid for the rest of my life.

Three Things I Hate:
1. How much of a perfectionist I am, but only about weird, stupid stuff (for example, I have been sitting here agonizing over whether or not to put periods at the end of EVERY answer for continuity's sake, or to only put periods at the end of ACTUAL sentences. Also, as a child I used to cry when someone sat on my bed and wrinkled it after I had made it.)
2. When I unload the dishwasher and realize that I didn't rinse the pans well enough and now there are hardened specks of food all over the clean glasses. In part, I hate it simply because Jim is always scrupulously scrubbing everything before he loads the dishwasher, and I am just going for speed, usually, even though I know his way is better. When I see the specks, I remember that he is right, and it makes me cranky.
3. Murderers, rapists, kidnappers, anyone who abuses children or animals, terrorists... Bad guys in general.

Three Things I Don't Understand:
1. Refer to answer number three from the previous question.
2. Any mathematical concepts higher than algebra.
3. Why people have children and then treat them terribly.

Three Things On My Desk:
1. Cup of decaf coffee.
2. Remote controls (desk is in the main TV room, and is positioned so that one can simultaneously watch Scrubs AND keep updated on Pistons scores. We're big multitaskers around here!)
3. A lamp with a burnt out bulb I haven't replaced yet.

Three Things I'm Doing Right Now:
1. Being disgusted by my combination of morning and coffee breath.
2. Listening to Adelay not napping on the monitor.
3. Thinking about how I really need to get myself cleaned up for the baby shower, since it will take a good long while to scrub off the grime from this weekend!

Three Things I Want To Do Before I Die:
1. Travel a LOT more, like say, outside of the country (and I don't mean Canada or a small tropical island owned by a resort chain.)
2. See my children happy and content in their adult lives.
3. Move somewhere with mild, temperate weather, instead of this fun combination of raging humidity and freak snowstorms.

Three Things I Can Do:
1. Appear a lot more self-assured than I actually am.
2. Other people's makeup (I'm truly much better at this than most people, so I had to include it. I never, for instance, rest the edge of my hand on your cheekbone while I'm doing your eyeliner, thereby smudging your already applied blush. I never try to do the mascara for you- people are always better at that themselves. Nor would I apply foundation and then begin to put on eyeshadow without first dusting your foundation with loose powder. I mean, the eyeshadow flecks stick in the wet foundation, people! You have to powder FIRST!)
3. Clean very thoroughly.

Three Things I Can't Do:
1. Make pie crust from scratch (I have never actually tried, but I have no desire to whatsoever, so I'm going to assume I will never pick up this skill.)
2. Shave without nicking myself.
3. Spend more than thirty bucks on a pair of shoes. It just kills me, for some reason, even though a good pair of shoes is hardly a wholly frivolous purchase. And trust me, I have made some wholly frivolous purchases without a twinge of regret.

Three Things I Think You Should Listen To:
1. Your mom.
2. Your kids, if they're trying to tell you something- don't assume you always know what happened, or what their intentions were, or what they were thinking.
3. Your own instincts. Provided you have good instincts. And if you don't, work on honing them and tuning out the outside voices which have previously muddled them.

Three Things You Should Never Listen To:
1. Criticism from people whose opinions you don't care about or respect anyways.
2. The ongoing drama of Anna Nicole Smith- get a life, people! She was one step above a crack whore, and this country pays more attention to her death than we did to Mother Theresa's.
3. Dr. Phil's banal, so-called advise. I could offer more insight in my sleep. I think most people could.

Three Things I'd Like To Learn:
1. To speak Spanish.
2. To relax and be in the moment.
3. To ride horseback gracefully. (I still have this secret wish to be one of the members of The Saddle Club.)

Three Favorite Foods:
1. anything Mexican
2. peaches and watermelon (I know, I shamelessly cheated and squeezed in two.)
3. cheese and crackers

Three Shows I Watched As A Kid:
1. Growing Pains
2. Mr. Roger's Neighborhood
3. Little House On The Prairie

Three Things I Regret:
1. Allowing a certain relationship to affect my self-esteem so much.
2. Having such crappy eating habits in high school, because I can't get away with them anymore- I need to set a good example.
3. Not taking a trip with my friends the summer after our senior year.

Three People I'm Tagging:
I actually think most people have done this one already, so I'm just going to say, if you haven't yet, and you're at a loss for a post topic, feel free to consider yourself tagged!