Monday, April 20, 2009

Shopping: Perhaps They Should Add It To The Menu At Guantanamo

I need a hipectomy. According to the fashion industry, anyways. I swear to you on a stack of Levi's, I tried on FIFTEEN pairs of jeans yesterday, in search of just ONE style that would not gap at my waist, pool on the floor around my ankles, be made entirely of spandex, require me to tug them up every ten seconds, make my thighs look like bratwursts, or expose my backside every time I kneel down to pick up a kid. I came up empty handed.

All I ended up choosing in the three hours I perused the mall was an adorable sundress for Addy at TCP (five dollars!) and a pack of cini-minis at Cinnabon. (Note: cini-mini consumption has nothing to do with bratwurst-y shape of thighs.)

In other news, Eli made his first attempt at a sentence today. Namely, "Wan wash Boo's Coo's." English translation: "I want to watch Blue's Clue's."

11 comments:

Hillary said...

I think we should stage a revolution against the jeans manufacturers and demand they create a style that fits people who are not 15-feet tall with sticks for legs.

Scottish Twins said...

Congrats Eli!

And about the jeans, I swear it's a conspiracy to make us all feel bad about ourselves. I mean come on!! They can't figure out a way to make comfortable jeans that flatter normal-sized women? Do they not realize that normal women have hips, thighs and booties??

Saly said...

Ugh, I hate buying jeans too. Just becasue I have hips does not mean that I am also 6 feet tall. (!!)

Jess said...

I totally understood Eli's sentence WITHOUT the translation. Go me!

Michelle said...

I HATE buying jeans to the depths of my soul. I usually have two pair at a time that I can wear and I hang on to those like my life depends on it. Seriously, average is always too long and short always looks like I'm preparing for a flood.

But on a happier note, congrats to Eli!

Kelsey said...

This may be the most UNCOOL suggestion you ever receive, but you can buy jeans from Land's End and basically tell them how long you need them to be, at least certain styles. In my experience this helps with the fact that all of us aren't six feet tall and wearing size 2 - might be worth checking out. They also have great customer service and a great return policy.

mLou said...

...and I thought those cinni-minnies were to take home to the kids and hubby :-)

Mommy Daisy said...

Jean shopping sucks. I just settle with whatever fits without falling down. Then they always fall down after being washed. (I do have a solution for the bare backside though. Watch my blog & review blog this week. I'm hoping to get it up soon.)

Yay Eli! So cute!

Astarte said...

I know!!! Jeans shopping used to be so easy, and now it's a huge pain in the ass! WHY do they make pants that fall off if you sit down?! And, don't any of these people have a WAIST? Sheesh!

Swistle said...

No, no, no: you need Waist Augmentation, because you are too thin in the waist for their jeans! How's THAT?

Also, agree about Lands' End. I like ordering my inseam instead of getting the ones that drag behind me.

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