Tuesday, April 05, 2011

Introspection and Whole Grains

Ugh. I just ate like half a box of Frosted Chocolate Mini Wheats. My gut hurts. Not as much as it will later, though! Fiber ahoy!

Er, anyWHAYS, I'm in a totally spaced-out mood today, so I don't think I'm up for finishing my thirty day blog challenge with a bang. I was supposed to write about hopes and dreams, I think? Right now all I can think of is, "I hope someday I don't feel so incredibly tired and unable to function right about this time every day." (I'm sure consuming all those carbs and sugars has nothing to do with it...)

I swear, every day, dinnertime is a surprise to me. Five o' clock rolls around and I'm all, "Wha...? We have to EAT again? And I have to plan it and cook it?" Whenever we go over to our neighbor's house she has her weekly meal plan on the fridge, with things like, "Italian subs and homemade coleslaw" on it, and I think about all the times I have tried and then inevitably abandoned various meal plans. Eventually they start to annoy and bore me, like any form of routine or structure (except bedtime, which feels more like FRANTICALLY DARTING OUT THE ESCAPE HATCH TOWARD FREEDOM time- hard to get tired of that.)

I dislike this particular character trait in myself, this extreme resistance to schedules, and I feel it makes me less of a parent sometimes. Yet here I am, closing in on twenty seven years, and I still struggle with it daily. I want to be spontaneous, to go with the flow, to follow my heart, ride off into the sunset etc etc etc unrealistic dreamer blah blah. Instead I wash sheets and I mop the floor and I give baths, and usually manage to do it all on a somewhat routine basis, but then there are fails, too, like this morning when it was breakfast time and our cupboards contained NONE of the following items: bread, cereal, crackers. And we're not on Atkins. Or there's the zillion times we're running late and I'm snapping at the kids to hurry HURRY HURRY! even as my inner voice whispers that it is way more my fault than theirs that we're behind schedule.

Sigh. Tomorrow I'll remember my strong suits. Today it seems I'll be eating my (newly purchased) cereal for dinner and pondering, yet again, how to do better.

5 comments:

Nik-Nak said...

Ugh...dinnertime is a constant battle at our house too. I always wish to do some awesome home cooked meal but we usually end up with spaghetti or stir fry or sandwiches. And that's on a good day.

Michelle said...

About once every two months, I swear I will do better with dinners. I spend Sunday cooking two or three different things that we can eat throughout the week with minimal prep time. It never lasts long. I don't understand people who can do this regularly.

d e v a n said...

Or there's the zillion times we're running late and I'm snapping at the kids to hurry HURRY HURRY! even as my inner voice whispers that it is way more my fault than theirs that we're behind schedule.
--- Totally me.

Mommy Daisy said...

I find that I always want to maintain a schedule, but I have a hard time sticking with it. With meals I've gotten better the last few months. We have a dry erase refrigerator thing. I create an idea of a menu plan really, and I also list other ingredients that might be a good meal sometime when needed. I don't schedule every day, and I do write in leftover days. It's helped.

clueless but hopeful mama said...

I aspire to be better organized with dinners. But, mostly, I've given up.

Well, okay, that's not totally true.

I refuse to stress myself out. And planning does keep me from stressing daily. It takes a lot of energy to get started but once I do, it really helps.

If we have time, I plan some meals for the week on Sunday (I make CG talk them through with me so I can be sure when he'll be home.), then I buy the needed groceries on Monday. Then I schedule in days for take-out, left-overs and eating at CG's workplace (they have a cheap restaurant/pub in house that ROCKS).

(Most importantly, I LOVE the title to this post. Best title ever.)