We interrupt your regularly scheduled morning with this announcement:
I think I ate my weight in Nutella last night. O.M.G. I still feel sick and sluggish just thinking about it.
I was really craving more chocolate dipped pretzel sticks, but they were all packed up to go to Grandma's house this weekend. Sad. But then I had this genius idea to dunk the leftover, undipped mini pretzel rods in Nutella while watching The Office and 30 Rock last night. And I don't mean, here and there I dunked one in, the way a normal person might eat such a fattening snack. No, I mean that for an hour straight my hand was in constant motion between the pretzel bag, the Nutella jar, and my gaping pie hole. I'm sure it was just the sexiest thing EVAH to watch. I should've had someone tape me, so I could sell the video online to that sadly neglected segment of the p0rn industry consumer demographic- the calorie fetish folks.
Yeah... I should probably go to the gym now. After I eat my morning snack of Nutella on toast, that is. (Isn't it hilarious how they dare to advertise that stuff as part of a nutritious breakfast, btw? Yeah, sure it is, if you eat an egg and whole wheat toast and a glass of orange juice and then have the chocolate spread as your dessert. Let's end the charade, Nutella. Ditto to you, Pop Tarts.)